Have you ever wondered what unicorns taste like? Of course you have. But you’re unlikely to find out, even if you crack open this tin, because despite being called Canned Unicorn Meat, it contains nothing of the sort.
But before you hop back over the rainbow to scoff Turkish delight with the wood nymphs and seek out genuine enchanted tripe, allow us to explain. This spooftastic tin really does contain a unicorn. Okay, so it’s a cute little plush one that’s been dismembered for your twisted amusement, but who cares about that when some dimwit opens the cupboard and asks about the local availability of mythical meat.